Beginner's Mind

Yesterday I had plans to attend a yoga class with my favorite instructor. I was looking forward to it, but I was also spending time with something else that I also loved. I felt torn between the two and wanted a way to have some time with both. It was pointed out to me that I "needed" to go to my yoga class. This I knew, but something about being told this from someone else, and given the current circumstances, I was left feeling hurt, embarrassed, and rejected. I pouted and left feeling sorry for myself. It's funny how we do this. Clearly the intent was good, but since I didn't like it-for some reason I still don't know-I selfishly acted like a soiled brat. I actually went and laid in bed pouting like a child. This is not what yoga teaches me and I came to see that. I was like, "you know what? I am not going to let this mood and this situation stop me from going to my yoga class!" So, I pulled my egotistical, pouty, spoiled self out of bed and to yoga. I was actively trying to get out of that frame of mind and into something better. This is a hard task, but anyone can do it so long as you are really honest with yourself, recognize what you are doing, and apply yourself. So, I got to yoga to find that my favorite instructor had a substitute for the day. "Dammit!" was my ego's first reaction, but again this is not how I want to think or be, so I actively again tried to get out of that frame of mind. Much to my dismay, I thoroughly enjoyed the class and the instructor. With opening my mind I got something out of her class that I may not have gotten from J's class or any other class for that matter. And that is my point my friends, we should always go through life with an open mind to all things; new and old. I was recently reminded of a Zen Buddhism concept of a "beginner's mind".  It refers to having an attitude of openness, eagerness, and lack of preconceptions. Zen teacher Shunryu Suzuki writes in his book Zen Mind, Beginner's Mind, "In the beginner's mind there are many possibilities, in the expert's mind there are few." I automatically had a preconceived idea that I would not like the class because J wasn’t the one leading it. I have been in this place before with other instructors. This is a quality of mine that I do not like and have been working on it for some time. I have actually improved, but it is was so bad that at times you cannot see the improvement.  I know that I would not want others to have a preconceived notion of me if they come to a class and see me instructing instead who they originally thought would be. This is because I know that I can bring something to a class that others may not…we all can. Every single individual brings something unique and special to the universe we just have to be open…we have to approach it with a “beginner’s mind.”